Monday, January 18, 2010

People & Their Perceptions!

Well, life is always interesting, especially when it comes to people!

As usual, family opinions and perceptions are in overdrive now that Dad has decided to stay here for the winter.

From their perceptions, we live in the hinterlands at the End of the World; we're weird, "don't do anything," and are only interested in his money. What a few of them forget is it's HIS money and he's already doled out nearly every cent he had saved to ALL of us, them included.

And then there's old wounds, old prejudices and old judgements and a few of them cling so much to them that they can't operate in the present - for Dad's benefit. Oh well, they're the losers as far as we're concerned.

In two weeks he's had two phone calls and one visit - despite me reaching out in order to keep Dad "in the loop." Today I was nearly brought to tears and then got pissed. My Dad asked me to call his cell phone to see if it was still working!!!

Tomorrow, we take him to his house to pick up a few things, drop him off at my youngest sister's (if she remembers), then take him to his doctor appointment. You can bet I'll ask her and any other family member I see if they've forgot about him.

It's a sad day when family can't get beyond their judgements and absurd fantasies about "What they're doing to Dad" and just spend time with him.

Two nights ago my sister-in-law emailed her husband and told her about Dad. She also sent him my email to her concerning him. In it I was upbeat and informative and attached a picture of Dad. The A-- wrote back to her and said, "Well, isn't she cute!" This was followed by a barrage of criticisms and accusations, some from when our childhood!

No wonder he trains snipers! Goes straight for the juggler and ignores the the elderly, ill man.

Sorry for the rant but I can't and won't sit here and bitch to my Dad about the jerks. Maybe tomorrow I'll be back on track regarding prepping and homesteading, etc.


Anonymous said...

..."You can bet I'll ask her and any other family member I see if they've forgot about him."...And then the clouds will part and big music will fill the air, a golden shaft of light will bathe them and they'll break out in beatific smiles ever grateful that you showed them the error of their ways.


Anonymous said...

there is a lot more mentally ill people than physically ill.i would guess they know what buttons to push to get a rise out of family certainly knows my buttons.hang in there ,be nice to them and they will wonder what your up to lol

SciFiChick said...

What a load of crap! I find it sad that his cell has rang twice in two weeks. and they are tossing emails back and forth about BS?
And hun, you just rant to your hearts content. It's your blog and there are lots of us out here praying for you and yours. Like you need to stress your dad acting like your family does! Hang in there.

LOL my word verification is imarat.... sounds like your sister!

Mayberry said...

Vent it out Tree, we're here to listen. Ain't family great? : )

Anonymous said...

Did they call or visit him when he was at home? Tigers don't change there stripes. You are doing what is don't let them get to you. You are looking out for your dad's best interest. Do they think you have him chained to the recliner so he can't leave on his own? :) Sometimes you gotta laugh or you're gonna cry. Just keep on doin' what's right. I'm on your side. And it's your blog talk about what you want.

treesong said...

THANK YOU to SciFichick, Mayberry, Angrywhiteman and both Anonymous's! I reread my post this morning after 10 hours of sleep. Wow, I can bitch!

Oh well, today's another day. Onward with a smile on my face and joy in my heart. We are indeed, the fortunate ones.

We're off to town for his doctor appointment, Meals on Wheels, visiting an aunt at the Medical Care Facility, visiting my youngest sister and some shopping. I'm worn out just writing that, LOL.

Later, Treesong

HermitJim said...

Tree...I know where you're coming from and believe me...things will work out!

At least, that's what I keep telling myself! I have to believe that, otherwise I' go nuts!

Glad Dad is doing better! That's a good thing, my friend!

Thinking good thoughts about you and the family!

Did it MY way said...

You are a wonderful daughter, and a wonderful person. Keep up the good work, and I know your dad appreciates you.

Rant all you want...your blog family is here to listen.

See Ya

Anonymous said...

I have a friend who says, "Just cause they are related to you don't mean you gotta love 'em." You do what's best for your Dad, the others will talk about you no matter what because they have small, selfish minds. Keep on venting, it relieves the stress.
Sharon @ the meadowhouse.

WomanWhoRunsWithHorses said...

Treesong ...Sometimes our self-perception needs to be examined too. You recently accused yourself of whining, now you are accusing yourself of bitching. But I see neither of those traits in your posts.

You are doing what YOU know in your heart to be the right thing for your dad. It was even HIS idea, if I recall. Since it was HIS idea, he could have called up one of the relatives and proposed the same arrangement. He didn't though, did he. Could it be that he chose YOU because he knows how the rest of them are too?? Hmmm?

Cut yourself some slack and enjoy this time with your dad. Even the stress moments will be fond memories one day when he's no longer on this earth.