Thursday, May 21, 2009
It's Priorities People. Priorities.
Today I made a quick trip to town for a few supplies and stopped in at the bank with my container of rolled pennies.
Our account is currently at Chase Bank where they practically trip over themselves when you walk in the door. I was soon escorted into a cubicle where the young gentleman said we could "discuss the current status of your accounts" while another employee counted my coinage. Imagine the poor man's surprise when I told him I don't have any account in my name, though I'm beneficiary on a few.
These people must take classes in what I call "the quick recovery." You know, maintaining that plastic smile while they control their disappointment and ease out of the meeting while maintaining mutual grace. So the guy asked how I could not to have any bank accounts. "Just fine," I said. "I'm strictly cash."
"How do you manage that?" he asked.
"Nicely," I said with a smile.
He seemed at a momentary loss for words so I decided to brag about our recent real estate transaction. Low and behold he has an uncle who lives about 10 miles from our new home and is a member of the 120 acre Sportsman's Club across the road. We then chatted about the declining real estate market and the frivolous spending habits of people who are losing their homes while attempting to buy ours on a land contract. He smiled and said: "I have the feeling you could educate a few of them on how to live within their means."
"I could try but they'd have that deer in the headlights look and feel deprivation pulsing through their veins," I said. He laughed and said, "Well, I was going to say it's been nice doing business with you but you're not really a customer."
I smiled and said, "No offense to you personally, but I intend to keep it that way."
Then I was off to the grocery store where my favorite clerk was one duty. She asked about our trip north and I showed her some pictures of the place. "God, I'd love to be able to do that but how?" she asked. "Simple, you stop grocery shopping every day; you turn in your three cell phones; your disconnect the cable TV; and you decide to sit at home every day instead of going out."
"I'd go nuts," she said.
"Well, I guess I'd go nuts if I lived the way you do." She laughed as I said my remark wasn't meant to be derogatory. "Oh, I know," she said, "You two deserve your new place. If I'd get off my butt I might have the same thing. Guess I'm just in a rut."
Then, as she slides eight 32 oz. jars of Miracle Whip through the scanner she notes the "Buy 2 and save $1.00" coupon on top of the jars. "Wow! I never noticed these and I've scanned a lot of these today!"
WHAT???? You're a clerk in a grocery store and you don't notice a high volume of Miracle Whip purchases? Or did most people buying them not notice the coupon on top?
Either way, I DID. So that's two jars for $1.50 instead of the usual $3.29 per jar this store charges. You bet I noticed.
Next I went to Family Dollar where two women in line were bemoaning the night cost of living. If I had plastic nails, false eyelashes and TWO cell phones hooked on my jeans and then strutted out the door to my 2009 Dodge Nitro I couldn't afford much either.
It's priorities people. Priorities.